Assignment 11: Dylan Ruddy

As far as physical things that scare me, it's super lame I know, but it would probably be turning all the lights out downstairs, and then having to run upstairs. Every time I have to do this I know there is nothing to be afraid of but I find myself turning on every light on my path upstairs, then starting from the back and turning them off as I am running full speed. Once I am in the upstairs hallway I'm okay but I can still feel the Adrenaline.
As far as other stuff that I have more of a justification for, I am very afraid of failing and not being successful. Not like failing a test or anything but living a boring life, working a nine to five job, not getting paid a lot. I think the roots of this fear come from my childhood dreams, you know the ones where you spend your time floating on a watch, riding horses, throwing dinner parties, and driving exotic cars. I always thought that as long as I worked hard, these things would come in time, but as I get older and older I realize that I'm dreaming about the 1%, and it takes more than hard work to get them.
I also fear my interpersonal relation skills. I don't like small talk, and frankly am just bad at it so I just don't engage in it. This however means that I just do not talk, which make me and those around uncomfortable. I also can mumble when I talk, which makes it hard for people to understand me. Onto of this I find it difficult to articulate the words is speech even if I know exactly what I want to sa in my head. If that wasn't enough I can come across as arrogant sometimes, and am told that I have a face that looks like it is constantly judging people. So that is probably one of my deepest darkest fears.